The Dingleberry Dilemma
Dear Mouthy Housewives,
What is your advice for when my dog is trying to do his business but that little rogue dingleberry gets stuck and it won’t come out? Do you let him scoot it out in the grass or do you go “in country” to help?
Signed, Confused Over Dingleberries
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Dear Confused Over Dingleberries,
In the spirit of honesty (because it’s totally in vogue right now in the blogosphere), I don’t have a dog. So why have I chosen to answer your question? Because I had a dog. A dog that would have scooted from New York City all the way to New Orleans if I had let her. But mostly she just did it on our living room rug. When we had company. Especially company that didn’t care for dogs.
So obviously, I have the canine experience to help you. But just in case, I did consult with a highly regarded veterinarian who was happy to discuss “dingleberries,” “scooting” and going “in country.” I told you she was highly regarded.
She describes a dingleberry as a “small piece of stool caught in the fur by the anus.” She recommended just picking it off because who wants it to fall or get rubbed off (otherwise known as scooting) on the rug or furniture. If you’re dog has longish hair on its backend, you may want to clip it to prevent this problem.
Now if some of the stool is caught in the anus (which I think is your dog’s issue), “you would gently squeeze on either side of the anus to help it out.” Now obviously, a deep love for your dog is a necessity before you’re willing to squeeze the sides of its anus. But I’ll leave that decision up to you. My suggestion is to have a couple cocktails first.
If you’re still having a problem and considering going “in country,” I would speak to your veterinarian first because imagine how much alcohol you will need to erase that memory.
Good luck to you,
Kelcey, TMH
7 Responses to “The Dingleberry Dilemma”
Comment by Akilah Sakai.
Suddenly my chocolate addiction has been curbed.
(But only for 72 hours or so.)
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Comment by Lori@Not Always Charming.
OMG…soda just spewed out of my mouth and nose! Too flippin funny.
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Comment by killerboots.
Those are called Dingleberries?! My dad always referred to them as willnots, because sometimes, they just will not come out.
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Comment by Inna.
I saw a lady shaking her dog’s behind trying to free the dingleberrie. I didn’t stick around long enough on the sidewalk to see the outcome. It was some violent shaking going on.
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Comment by Maria @BOREDmommy.
And this is why I don’t have a dog. No amount of cocktails could get me anywhere near a dog’s butt.
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