Comments on: So, About This Turkey Thing

By: Karen

Karen — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 20:25:50 +0000

Don’t you remember that episode of Frasier when his dad complained becasue they had fancy “fresh” cranberry sauce because it is just not the same if it doesn’t have the ridges from the can?

You could go all out trying to fix fancy things, but if they are not expecting it then you wasted your time.

I agree with doing the turkey if you feel comfortable or ordering one if you don’t. Mashed potatoes, gravy from a mix, green bean casserole, cranberry sauce from a can, stuffing from a mix…what more do you need? Macaroni and cheese from a box looks all fancy if you put it in a casserole dish, top with some extra cheese and bake it.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 17:48:10 +0000

How about an actual conversation with your husband about this? Did he really invite them without asking you? And what gives with him expecting you to cook when whatever you cooks sucks? Are you exaggerating how bad your cooking is or is he just delusional that you will suddenly cook something yummy? I mean, it doesn’t make any sense that he’d want you to cook.

By: amy

amy — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 06:34:14 +0000

Been married 17 years and never done the freaking turkey! From the sounds of it from hubby though it is the easiest part; stuff and shove in oven.

mashed potatos are easy, throw in a veggie side dish or two, gravy and you are good to go.

You Can do this! And hope you fully expect next year they will return the favor~!

By: Karin

Karin — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 04:53:43 +0000

Those Reynolds turkey bags are awesome and I agree with phd that upside down birds are best (you can also do a “practice” bird the week before and freeze the cut up meat in case something goes wrong on the big day). I just made gravy from scratch for the first time ever (yes, I’m an experienced cook but I don’t really like gravy so it never crosses my mind to make it from drippings) and let me tell you, don’t waste your time – buy the stuff in the jar.

For something that looks hard and can be done in advance, twice baked potatoes – I do both white potatoes and sweet potatoes. Bake potatoes the day before, cut in 1/2 short ways, scoop out potato, set in tact skin “cups” in greased cupcake pan, make mashed potatoes (I use Allrecipe’s gourmet sweet potato recipe for the sweet potatoes), fill “cups” & top, refrigerate. Bake for 35 minutes after you take the bird out of the oven. Make sure you have the stuff that goes on twice baked white potatoes (bacon bits, sour cream, chives) even if you don’t eat it (experience taking here).

Bake everything in disposable tins. This way your Mrs. Smith’s pies won’t look out of place AND hubby dearest will be “doing the dishes” by taking the trash/recycling out. I’d also go with disposable plates but that’s just me – I’ll cook or do dishes but I ain’t doin’ both and I guarantee that the thought of doing either of those things never crossed hubby’s mind (his brain turns to mush when his family is around).

By: Brianna

Brianna — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 23:40:39 +0000

If your relatives are long-distance, this is pretty easy. Buy your precooked, gorgeous turkey somewhere, a couple bags of those steam-n-mash frozen potatoes, and a bag of pre-seasoned bread cubes. Both potatoes and dressing are nearly foolproof and take less than two hours of prep and cooking time total, even for the complete novice. Then spend at least ten minutes thanking them for making the flight/drive to see you, effectively distracting them from the fact that none of the food was your doing. They’ll feel all warm and glowy from the gratitude you heap on them… and not the food poisoning they’d otherwise get. If they aren’t complete douchebags, they’ll be grateful for the thanks and the poison-free food, and that will be that.

If they live close by, they likely already know of your lack of prowess in the kitchen, and won’t be at all surprised by the bought feast. Your husband will get over the non-home-cooked thing, or he can sleep on the couch next to his (probably much more appreciative) parents.

By: MommyTime

MommyTime — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 18:02:44 +0000

Save yourself time, hassle, and the nagging worry about salmonella by not stuffing the turkey. Instead make dressing, which is stuffing that is cooked in a casserole dish instead of stuffed inside the bird. An unstuffed bird cooks faster and more evenly, and you can use canned chicken or turkey broth to moisten the dressing, so that it is delicious. Those bags full of seasoned bread cubes that are everywhere right now have very easy dressing recipes on them.

By: the mama bird diaries

the mama bird diaries — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 17:50:01 +0000

I’ve always found that throwing money at a problem is highly successful.

By: phd in yogurtry

phd in yogurtry — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 14:52:35 +0000

I highly recommend this method:

Part One: Husband cooks the turkey. Part Two: Wife worries about the side dishes.
Part Three: In-laws bring the pies.

Husband stuffs it with oranges and apples (as learned from Harry, formerly LBJ’s Ranch house cook). Also, don’t stuff the bird with bread. Dries it out. Finally, cook the bird upside down. Breast down. It’s not as pretty but the breast stays moist and tender.

Now again, my first hand experience is limited to sitting at the table, stuffing my face with delicious turkey, and listening to my husband expound about his many talents. But it works for us.

By: DG at Diaryofamadbathroom

DG at Diaryofamadbathroom — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 11:45:01 +0000

Here are two tips if you can’t find a prepared turkey –

1) If you are having a crowd (10 or more people) it might be safer and saner to cook two breasts instead of one bird. Cooking time and doneness across parts won’t be as challenging.

2) Butterball has a turkey help line that can help you with any any questions or issues you may have. I think they are even open on Thanksgiving day. –

Phone Number: 1-800-BUTTERBALL (1-800-288-8372). The Butterball® Turkey Talk-Line is open annually in November and December.