Let’s Talk About Sex
Dear Mouthy Housewives,
I had dinner with a divorced friend that I don’t see that frequently and she was telling me about her new boyfriend and I don’t know what got into me, other than a few cocktails, and I asked her if they were having anal sex. And she said “Yes! It’s the best!” And then I felt like a prude because I’m an exit only girl AND I feel very awkward around her. Should I apologize for asking? Never talk to her again?
Signed, An Exit Only Girl
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Dear Exit Only,
As you can imagine, we get the “I’m so embarrassed because I asked my friend about her anal sex life” question CONSTANTLY so it’s really about time that we answered it.
Now when you say, you had a “few cocktails” do you mean like a vat of margaritas? Has your buzz even worn off yet? Well, even if you are still a bit tipsy, let’s tackle this problem.
My advice is to let it go. Judging from your friend’s exuberant response, “Yes! It’s the best!” I hardly think she was offended. And yes, you may feel awkward because you now have a serious visual when it comes to your friend’s sex life. But just imagine the awkwardness when you try to apologize when the two of you are sober.
But don’t stop talking to her either. Just send her off a fun, breezy email that says, “So fun having drinks with you and getting some much needed girl talk. Let’s do it again soon.”
If you just can’t let it go (and take it from a girl who is still pissed off about the color of the reception chairs at her wedding, I understand not being able to let something go), then have a conversation with her. But keep it light. For gosh sakes, don’t mention the word “anal.” Do not say, “I’m sorry I asked if you were having anal sex. But I think it’s great that you are. I mean, how awesome! Yahoo for you. And your boyfriend of course. Not that I do it. Because I don’t. But it’s so great that you do!!”
Instead, just say something like, “I had so much fun the other night! I hope the conversation didn’t get too personal. I’m sorry if it did. It’s just so nice to have a real conversation with someone.” And leave it at that.
And the next time you find yourself feeling a bit too inquisitive, excuse yourself and hit the powder room to refresh your lip gloss.
Good luck,
Kelcey, TMH
6 Responses to “Let’s Talk About Sex”
Comment by Wendi.
I don’t mean to be anal, but did you spell margarita correctly? Oh, yeah, you did.
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Comment by Mary.
Dear Exit Only Girl,
Welcome to my world. It is the world of the socially awkward.
Love,
Mary
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Comment by assomeoneelse.
I’m rather curious as to how you led up to this question? I mean this isn’t one of those things that you just toss out there. “What brand of wine did you say this is? Are you guys butt scroggin? Love the new vase, is that Pottery Barn?”
There had to have been something in the conversation that led up to you asking that question. I imagine the conversation was already on the intimate side so unless you tossed that query out between asking for her dip recipe and where she got her new haircut, there really wasn’t anything awkward about the question. And even if you did, she didn’t find it awkward at all.
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Comment by DG at Diaryofamadbathroom.
At least you didn’t sarcastically tell her “Oh, good for you. Congratulations on being the ‘up the butt girl’”.
Seems like there was no harm, no foul.
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Comment by luckylottielou.
I must be socially awkward, too. I called my daughter a skanky butt ho yesterday. Then I had to inform her what anal sex was. That was fun.
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admin Reply:
October 21st, 2009 at 8:16 pm
I think it was the cocktails that led up to the question. At least cocktails always led into awkward questions for me.
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