Let’s Talk About Sex
I know you all are heading out to lovely holiday parties and after a few pints of spiked eggnog, you’re bound to accidentally ask one of your friends about anal sex. And thankfully, The Mouthy Housewives have already come up with a solution to this awkward social faux pas. So enjoy this post from the TMH archives, otherwise known as, “It’s Christmas week and you know I’m too lazy to write a brand new post.”
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Dear Mouthy Housewives,
I had dinner with a divorced friend that I don’t see that frequently and she was telling me about her new boyfriend and I don’t know what got into me, other than a few cocktails, and I asked her if they were having anal sex. And she said “Yes! It’s the best!” And then I felt like a prude because I’m an exit only girl AND I feel very awkward around her. Should I apologize for asking? Never talk to her again?
Signed, An Exit Only Girl
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Dear Exit Only,
As you can imagine, we get the “I’m so embarrassed because I asked my friend about her anal sex life” question CONSTANTLY so it’s really about time that we answered it.
Now when you say, you had a “few cocktails” do you mean like a vat of margaritas? Has your buzz even worn off yet? Well, even if you are still a bit tipsy, let’s tackle this problem.
My advice is to let it go. Judging from your friend’s exuberant response, “Yes! It’s the best!” I hardly think she was offended. And yes, you may feel awkward because you now have a serious visual when it comes to your friend’s sex life. But just imagine the awkwardness when you try to apologize when the two of you are sober.
But don’t stop talking to her either. Just send her off a fun, breezy email that says, “So fun having drinks with you and getting some much needed girl talk. Let’s do it again soon.”
If you just can’t let it go (and take it from a girl who is still pissed off about the color of the reception chairs at her wedding, I understand not being able to let something go), then have a conversation with her. But keep it light. For gosh sakes, don’t mention the word “anal.” Do not say, “I’m sorry I asked if you were having anal sex. But I think it’s great that you are. I mean, how awesome! Yahoo for you. And your boyfriend of course. Not that I do it. Because I don’t. But it’s so great that you do!!”
Instead, just say something like, “I had so much fun the other night! I hope the conversation didn’t get too personal. I’m sorry if it did. It’s just so nice to have a real conversation with someone.” And leave it at that.
And the next time you find yourself feeling a bit too inquisitive, excuse yourself and hit the powder room to refresh your lip gloss.
Good luck,
Kelcey, TMH
